Ok. Lived in Phoenix, AZ for about 1 1/2 years now… I have come to the conclusion that its either one extreme or the next here. If you get harassed, which happens quite often out here and you say something, they either call you a psycho or act agressively towards you, if you dont say anything, your a big baby and you deserve it and if you play along with it, your a huge slut and it only gets worse. I know Im hypersensitive sometimes, side effect of the C-PTSD this shithole gave me years ago but really??? Personally I think they do these things to break you down. Its very sexist out here… kinda like the wife has to obey bullshit… An ex-boyfriend of mine from many years ago had this philosophy of this place… That all men should have there “main squeeze” (ex., wife, girlfriend) and one mistress type off to the side. I first thought thats what he wanted from me but now I see it is a lifestyle here and probably elsewhere also (San Diego perhaps?). As far as Im concerned to each his own, do what ye will and mind your own fucken business. But these people are relentless and they wont leave you alone. They meddle in your relationships, your personal business, twist around the things you say… all in some hopes to break a woman down into a doormat!? My husband and I have been extremely happily together for 12 years now (married 8) and we have remained monogamous. Were an attractive couple with a happy sex life… yes IT IS POSSIBLE! People out here they just dont get that. They have to get in your business. Like some sick sort of man made family of imbreeders!? Fine if its for some, but its not welcome here.
So anyway, this has definitely caused issues in my marriage. Not because my husband is for this but because he doesnt see most of this when it happens. Its either when hes off at work (which he doesnt work anymore because hes been diagnosed with Stage 4 colon cancer… HERE!), or Im out walking the dog, or even something subtly said right in front of him (again, maybe I just notice cause of my PTSD). These people obviously have done this before. And ofcourse “Im” the crazy one. Oh yes, I have had my meltdowns, but in all honesty it shuts them up for a while, so I dont really care. hehehe. Maybe somewhere deep inside its my way at getting back at those who call me babe and honey, or stare at my vagina, or scream cunt in my face…. blah blah blah. That I guess is the worse of it but it really does wear on you after a while. It started really strong and slowly tapered off (especially after my husbands diagnosis) to where you have no idea when to expect it and you never see it coming. Catches you off guard to where your just standing there like a deer in headlights waiting for the crash to come! Oh, and I have panic attacks now. Ive only had three bouts of it since last October, but I havnt had even any anxiety attacks in years (since I last lived here) and now Im having panic attacks! And you think these people stop!? Hell No!!! They are seriously predatory here. Anyways, we are planning a trip out to Los Angeles (where we used to live) here in a few weeks and Im trying to schedule time with my old therapist. Still waiting to hear back on that. But yhea, besides that the good news is I had a huge court victory. It is now joint custody (of the only kid left) with zero child support for either party. Only took them fifteen years and a whole bunch of bullshit to give me exactly what I asked for in the first place. But at least I dont have to ever deal with there douchebag dad again not to mention, no more court hearings! Hurray!!! That to me is a victory 😀
plumcrazyinaz 